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[夜与日].(night.and.day).(英)弗吉尼亚·伍尔芙.文字版-第章

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could give him certainty? Could Katharine; Katharine who 
had lately lain in his arms; Katharine herself the most 
admired of women? He looked at her; with doubt; and 
with anxiety; but said nothing。 

“Yes; yes;” she said; interpreting his wish for assurance; 
“it’s true。 I know what she feels for you。” 

“She loves me?” 

Katharine nodded。 

“Ah; but who knows what I feel? How can I be sure of 
my feeling myself? Ten minutes ago I asked you to marry 
me。 I still wish it—I don’t know what I wish—” 

He clenched his hands and turned away。 He suddenly 
faced her and demanded: “Tell me what you feel for 

359 



Night and Day 

Denham。” 

“For Ralph Denham?” she asked。 “Yes!” she exclaimed; 
as if she had found the answer to some momentarily perplexing 
question。 “You’re jealous of me; William; but you’re 
not in love with me。 I’m jealous of you。 Therefore; for 
both our sakes; I say; speak to Cassandra at once。” 

He tried to pose himself。 He walked up and down 
the room; he paused at the window and surveyed the 
flowers strewn upon the floor。 Meanwhile his desire to 
have Katharine’s assurance confirmed became so insistent 
that he could no longer deny the overmastering 
strength of his feeling for Cassandra。 

“You’re right;” he exclaimed; ing to a standstill and 
rapping his knuckles sharply upon a small table carrying 
one slender vase。 “I love Cassandra。” 

As he said this; the curtains hanging at the door of the 
little room parted; and Cassandra herself stepped forth。 

“I have overheard every word!” she exclaimed。 

A pause succeeded this announcement。 Rodney made a 
step forward and said: 

“Then you know what I wish to ask you。 Give me your 

answer—” 

She put her hands before her face; she turned away and 
seemed to shrink from both of them。 

“What Katharine said;” she murmured。 “But;” she added; 
raising her head with a look of fear from the kiss with 
which he greeted her admission; “how frightfully difficult 
it all is! Our feelings; I mean —yours and mine and 
Katharine’s。 Katharine; tell me; are we doing right?” 

“Right—of course we’re doing right;” William answered 
her; “if; after what you’ve heard; you can marry a man of 
such inprehensible confusion; such deplorable—” 

“Don’t; William;” Katharine interposed; “Cassandra has 
heard us; she can judge what we are; she knows better 
than we could tell her。” 

But; still holding William’s hand; questions and desires 
welled up in Cassandra’s heart。 Had she done wrong in 
listening? Why did Aunt Celia blame her? Did Katharine 
think her right? Above all; did William really love her; for 
ever and ever; better than any one? 

“I must be first with him; Katharine!” she exclaimed。 “I 
can’t share him even with you。” 

360 



Virginia Woolf 

“I shall never ask that;” said Katharine。 She moved a 
little away from where they sat and began halfconsciously 
sorting her flowers。 

“But you’ve shared with me;” Cassandra said。 “Why can’t 
I share with you? Why am I so mean? I know why it is;” she 
added。 “We understand each other; William and I。 You’ve 
never understood each other。 You’re too different。” 

“I’ve never admired anybody more;” William interposed。 

“It’s not that”—Cassandra tried to enlighten him—”it’s 
understanding。” 

“Have I never understood you; Katharine? Have I been 
very selfish?” 

“Yes;” Cassandra interposed。 “You’ve asked her for sympathy; 
and she’s not sympathetic; you’ve wanted her to 
be practical; and she’s not practical。 You’ve been selfish; 
you’ve been exacting—and so has Katharine—but it 
wasn’t anybody’s fault。” 

Katharine had listened to this attempt at analysis with 
keen attention。 Cassandra’s words seemed to rub the old 
blurred image of life and freshen it so marvelously that it 
looked new again。 She turned to William。 

“It’s quite true;” she said。 “It was nobody’s fault。” 

“There are many things that he’ll always e to you 
for;” Cassandra continued; still reading from her invisible 
book。 “I accept that; Katharine。 I shall never dispute it。 
I want to be generous as you’ve been generous。 But being 
in love makes it more difficult for me。” 

They were silent。 At length William broke the silence。 
“One thing I beg of you both; he said; and the old 
nervousness of manner returned as he glanced at 
Katharine。 “We will never discuss these matters again。 
It’s not that I’m timid and conventional; as you think; 
Katharine。 It’s that it spoils things to discuss them; it 
unsettles people’s minds; and now we’re all so happy—” 

Cassandra ratified this conclusion so far as she was concerned; 
and William; after receiving the exquisite pleasure 
of her glance; with its absolute affection and trust; 
looked anxiously at Katharine。 

“Yes; I’m happy;” she assured him。 “And I agree。 We will 
never talk about it again。” 

“Oh; Katharine; Katharine!” Cassandra cried; holding out 
her arms while the tears ran down her cheeks。 

361 



Night and Day 

CHAPTER XXX 


The day was so different from other days to three people 
in the house that the mon routine of household life— 
the maid waiting at table; Mrs。 Hilbery writing a letter; 
the clock striking; and the door opening; and all the other 
signs of longestablished civilization appeared suddenly 
to have no meaning save as they lulled Mr。 and Mrs。 Hilbery 
into the belief that nothing unusual had taken place。 It 
chanced that Mrs。 Hilbery was depressed without visible 
cause; unless a certain crudeness verging upon coarseness 
in the temper of her favorite Elizabethans could be 
held responsible for the mood。 At any rate; she had shut 
up “The Duchess of Malfi” with a sigh; and wished to 
know; so she told Rodney at dinner; whether there wasn’t 
some young writer with a touch of the great spirit—somebody 
who made you believe that life was beautiful? She 
got little help from Rodney; and after singing her plaintive 
requiem for the death of poetry by herself; she 
charmed herself into go
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